Tracking the Miley Cyrus Wee!

Miley Cyrus has a sense a humor and is one of the few celebrities that might unabashedly admit she uses sex toys, so I’ll propose the following SNL script because the story about tracking use of the We-Vibes needs to trip around the comedy circuit, even though the invasion of privacy issue is disturbing.:

I propose– SNL write a sketch for Miley Cyrus and cast her as a Vibe tracker. Cyrus could mimic Lily Tomlin, who’s most famous skit was as a telephone operator and made famous the lines, “one ringy dingy… two ringy dingy”; they could even cameo Lily Tomlin. Cyrus would use the exclamation of “Wee!” to allude to the We-Vibe. A joke about Cyrus’s vibe usage when apart from her fiancé, with, Liam Hemsworth,  seems an appropriately inappropriate joke.

If you never heard about the sex toy controversy, this one headline by NPR

Vibrator Maker To Pay Millions Over Claims It Secretly Tracked Use

March 14, 20171:52 PM ET


This topic interests me because the main character in my novel heads an adult industry empire and she’s liable to pull a similar stunt in my third book in the series. Cyrus is probably the best choice for SNL, but she doesn’t fall within my region of interest.

The Beehives of Feminism


Beyoncé’s Beyhive is apparently attacking Emma Watson’s hive at this very moment. I’m not sure which side the lesbians of Les Ruches will take., but I imagine they will launch an attack on both. Back in 2015, Emma Watson made comments about the anti-Feminist voyeuristic nature of Beyoncé’s music video’s and now Watson is charged with hypocrisy for showing off her hoo-haws in a Vanity Fair photo shoot.

My novel satires the divisive nature of Feminism, so this war between celebrity Feminist hives—falls in line with a theme in my novel. Honey is the name of a character, in my novel, and the beehive is a symbol of the lesbians of Les Ruches.

Watson recruits men to support Feminism and men will usually support women showing off the hooter-eyes of Hooters. One of oldest jokes, in the world, apples here, “Women Bee Crazy.”

Wanting The Hit Man Wannabes

The news is always a great source of amusement. Pope Francis basically calls the Mexican youth—Hit Man wannabes then says countries need to open the doors to these apparent mobsters. Trump gave me a laugh when pointed out the walls to Vatican City—what is it? Protection from the Roman Catholics of Rome?

I don’t know if the Pope’s description of the Mexican youth is accurate because I only know what I hear on the news, but Roman Catholicism shaped Mexico. Top down management systems do not work and this is how Roman Catholicism operates.

Trump is bombastic, so I don’t know how serious to take him. He’s obviously not stupid. neutral is how I stand because this is partisan banter on both sides. Politicians just want votes, so they will always sell to the largest religious group. We will probably be down to Catholics and Muslims before long, all the small groups will be ignored. Which butt will you kiss?

This a quote from Reuters by PHILIP PULLELLA AND CHRISTINE MURRAY  and you have to wonder about the Pope’s choice in words if the hit man wannabes isn’t what he was thinking:

Saying Jesus would never ask them to be “hit men”, Pope Francis begged young people in Mexico’s gang-infested heartland on Tuesday to shun the lure of easy money and big cars offered by drug traffickers

Caligula’s Erection in Vatican City

Caligula's erection

Some things are too funny to pass up. The centerpiece to St. Peter’s Square is Caligula’s original erection idea for what was called the Vatican Circus. Augustus actually did the erecting, but the Emperor known for orgies brought the Pagan obelisk to Rome to use as spine for his Vatican Circus. Wikipedia has a hilarious quote; which you know is true:

Pedro Tafur quote from his Andanças[2][3] (circa 1440) mentions how “many passed between the ground and the “tower” basis “thinking it a saintly thing”.

End of humor

You can’t prove or disprove god, but humans created religion. Religions often take ownership of god. Muslims terrorists are doing the same as the Catholics did for centuries and. Supreme Court Justice. Sonia Sotomayor says her Catholicism makes her better than the Protestant founders of the US, even though Catholics fed natives to their dogs, raped, pillaged, and took slaves for centuries.  If you are religious, you need to remain humble because history is filled with religious dung.

I’m almost certain to have a tower, in this chapter in rewrite; I may have seven. An allusion to Caligula’s tower seems likely.

Caligula (1979) is the DVD shown

The Absurdity of our Times

anti-Feminist humor

Interpretation of Feminism from a possibly straight, sane man. Who will know when the last sane man turns mad or goes gay? Is it possible some lesbians will change sides? For those incapable of figuring this out – it is not homophobic, the joke is Feminism and the political correctness of sexual objectification, as this notably inferior male sees it.

The Dick Tag and Fem Organization


I get out of order easy. I planned to stay in the fauna category, but my mind went elsewhere. I did miss this snake item, so my departure in thought gave me some accidental help. I get into trouble when things fall into multiple categories. Tiresias can be classified as man, woman, or better yet – a metamorphosis. Hera turned him into a woman after he beat his snake (maybe the same thing happened to Michael Jackson — sorry can’t pass up a beat the meat pun). Snakes act as a new life symbol and also falls in to the fauna category that I was supposed to be organizing

I mean no harm in saying I need a woman in my life to act as secretary. I’m straight and the person who compliments me best is someone with secretarial skills. I am sure some women need a man with secretarial skills, but they don’t get into trouble with feminists for saying what best fits their needs. I’m guessing one of the two snakes is male and the other is female, but personality type trumps gender in who makes the best secretary.

I also see Tiresias as a Hermes type. She/he (notice I wrote it as female-slash-male even though putting the male first means no difference in my mind, I’m not mean). Tiresias also comes under possum because she/he is a main character in the T. S. Eliot’s poem, The Wasteland, and Eliot goes by the name – Old Possum.

My category and tag system is a mess because I get flustered in making these secretarial judgments, but feminist would get mad at me for using the word, “flustered,” on a woman instead of myself. I’m sorry I come in peace to those from Venus who wear the red of Mars. Now please someone tell me which category this goes under: humor, frustration, feminists, war and peace, snakes, possums, or even cats because the musical Cats comes from a piece of Eliot’s work and I have already written about the cat and snake connection.

I read there is some problem with throwing too many tags onto one post. Maybe I should have just one tag – junk. It seems many feminists see my junk (penis) as junk, so maybe a penis can make them happy if put in their junk (as in trunk – more fun with euphemisms). Dick is another euphemism for penis if people do not get my title. I just want to know where the Dick tag goes, all I know is who will have the blue balls.

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Squeak in’a Freak


Menists cry – foul or give the fowl finger to the goddesses for giving them the Job treatment and not giving them the Björk-job from her music video. Look how Björk portrays men on her Pagan Poetry album (last pic). Are we not more than a peeping Toms or just plain Dicks? Maybe not, but Menists cry anyway in fake outrage of our hairy forefathers. I’m sorry, but the more I read about the Catch 22’s of Feminism – the crazier I get or got or whatever. Men only ask–when you ladies decide what Feminism is; let us know and we might be willing to comply or at least plop things close enough to look like compliance. Right now the Feminist Bible looks like an inter-dimensional weaving of some very alien species. Did a man make Björk do a video which portrays a woman stitching a Wedding Dress to her body with to a Love-Lacein theme, and going Manson chick with the mantra of, “I love him, I love him, I love him? I lay odds Björk does everything on her own very free will.

Feminism is one of my Literary Buoys or Literary Star that things swim or orbit abound. Florida is another Literary Buoy, but Björk has little relevance to the topic of Florida. I squeak her into the freak category and she does circle the Feminist category. I think she also fits My trans-Atlantic crossing theory that Arctic Ocean fishers, like Laplanders, are related to the first people to cross over to the America’s. Pagan Poetry even fits “my roots of religion theme.” But, in all honesty; I just wanted her for the hair. I put it on the Swede, but I see it better fits my Hunnic Honey

Tongue Fishing in the Conch Republic


Add the clam shell goddess, Aphrodite, to the conch dwelling Hindu goddess, Lakshmi, and you may see a seafood eating theme. Some theories don’t hold their water, but some like women do. Womb = Water bearer and is where little babies swim. Males like the geyser god Enki claim to act a water givers and try to take their acclaim; thus, the fight a fight over the the ma in “marine,” between ma and man. Linguistic origins almost always get won by man, but ma held on. The conch like the womb also acted as a water bearer.

Look at Vishnu and his fishy birth canal look. Vishnu holds the Panchajanya; which, represents life and Vishnu uses it as his trumpet. I’m not going into the complex myths of Hindus; I just know what smells fishy. Did dudes in the past do some tongue fishing to go along with their spear fishing? I’m guessing, YES.

The Ashtamangala (3rd image) shows a conch in the upper right corner. It shows how the conch ranks up there with the sacred lotus and why Hindus blow the conch in many ceremonies.

The 1st image comes from the Aztecs. Native American loved their shells. In Florida, they used shells for most everything. They used a conch built hammer; they used a whelk for their ceremonial Black Drink; they used them as jewelry; they built shell mounds for multiple reasons; they used them as wampum as most everybody knows.

I hate the drive down to the Florida Keys, also known as the Conch Republic, but I know tongue fishing is a popular pastime down there. I have thought about going down for Fantasy Fest; it sounds like a good tongue fishing season.

Bikini Good, Bikini Bad


Bikinis got their name from a little bomb test on an island named Bikini Atoll. It came out bigger than planned. A Higgs Bikini ( I imagine it will look like the photo the on the left) doesn’t excite me; it looks too small. We might learn something, but pride may lead to a fall from Babel’s tower. I know some nuclear physics, but I’m not in the Big Leagues; I retired from the little leagues due to my scrambled eggs for brains. Knowing about the Higgs does fill some idle curiosity, but I only want to know which Bikini I get. The Red Sonja picture (© Luigi Novi / Wikimedia Commons) gives me pleasure, but I also see how it may give me pain. Will a Sheldon understand this concept?